Published in July '09-Of the Coachman and Democratic Donkeys

by Russell G. Davis

Promises of things too good to be true are almost always followed by cruel disappointments. Naivete is not a desirable characteristic in an adult or a child. Upon reviewing the classic Disney cartoon, Pinocchio, I am struck by the cruelty and modern relevance of the character "The Coachman". He appears to Pinocchio and his companion Lampwick (or in the novel precursor Candlewick) in a friendly guise beckoning children to journey to a Land of Toys or Pleasure Island only to turn them into donkeys and sell them to circuses and salt mines.

The result is a morality tale aimed directly at young boys. It is simple and has elements of truth in it as do the best morality tales. If you don't study hard and learn useful skills, if you pursue a life of idleness and no work, you'll be tricked into being a beast of burden for all of your days...Or words to that effect. I'll leave out the parts of the narrative that we don't see. Like parents grieving for their lost and missing son only to discover with horror his fate, fathers swearing revenge on this Coachman and burning his cruel Land of Toys to the ground, mothers discovering the whip marks on the donkey that once was her beloved baby. We're not supposed to think of things like this when hearing morality tales. We're supposed to look on smugly, join the Coachman in the indifference to the suffering boy/donkeys and repeat the moral so as to scare impressionable children away from a life of idleness and exploitation.

For we all know that as adults, if we avoid these temptations-smoking, drinking, vandalism, gambling, we automatically avoid a life of backbreaking manual labor.

Or do we?

The term backbreaking manual labor would be applicable to peasants in countries whom we have Free Trade Agreements with. That includes children who have never heard of Pinocchio, the Coachman, or anything regarding this fairy tale. The decision to condemn this child to 12 hour days in a factory for paltry pay have little to do with idleness and immorality and everything to do with some elitist signing a treaty and not caring about child labor laws. But once again, we are not supposed to think of these things when hearing simplistic morality tales. Just enjoy those sneakers.

I do have to say that I agree with the lesson of this morality tale and think that it is worthwhile to teach this to children. However, adults could also do with revisiting this morality tale. The Coachman is despicable but he is a fair representative of all those who promise something too good to be true and deliver a horrible fate to those who trust his incredible promises.

The Coachman promised us an era of "Compassionate Conservatism". What those who believed this got was no-bid contracts for military contractors, and a government that ignores it's Constitution by expanding the state via illegal wiretaps, torturing, and an attempt to send federal troops into a city.

The Coachman promised us that there were Weapons of Mass Destruction in Iraq that would result in a mushroom cloud if ignored. If we wanted to prevent another 9/11, we had to trust him and drink the brew of warmongering. The result for those who believed him was dead heroes who signed up to avenge 9/11 and dead Iraqi civilians.

The Coachman promised us that we could have economic prosperity while fighting a two front war. The result for those who believed him was a foreclosure epidemic, stock portfolios devastated, and near-Depression level unemployment.

And, of course, the nation was turned in Democratic Donkeys. Even that has not stopped the Coachman. He is still telling us that Climate Change is nothing to worry about and we don't need a public option for Health Care in this country.

Cleaning up this mess is not going to easy. The lesson of the morality tale regarding hard work should not be lost on the adults who delight in scaring children. You don't get out of work. Not permanently. No one does. And someone promising this to you is probably trying to trick you into more work. And adults need to realize that the Potential Death of our Biosphere and continued tolerance for cancerous evil profiteering insurance companies are not going to be defeated without hard work.

(note-This was published just as Obama was confirming those first signs of betraying his supporters in July '09.)